Instant

Just for a moment

I kid myself

that there is some innate element of this

that is special, unique, important

'meant to be'

And then you remind me

through my membership of your

exclusive club

that there is no love story here.

That I can fall for you

over and again

looking into your eyes

and seeing someone who I care for

so much.

That everytime

I will get hurt

I will fall on my face

because you have never fallen for

me.

My biggest death

when my heart drops

and my mouth goes dry

with panic

is when I realise you've fallen for someone

else instead.

Ouch.

I will fall for you, again.

With love, Beau xx

Diary Date

This is the regular reminder

of which you are a fantastic provider

that I need to look for more.

Because you get me this close

to some crazy notion

that there is a one and only

and that you might be it

and then again

You provide me with the knowledge

reminder

reassurance

that we are not a thing

that's right for me.

Thank god for that at least.

With love, Beau xx

The Wilderness

"Honey, we need to talk"

How many times in this year

have I tried to say that phrase?

How many time in this year

have I failed?

And it's for all the wrong reasons

like that you need to be saved.

And I'm sorry because honesty escapes me

every single day.

If this was right

why would my heart decide

to miss him every single day?

With love (always), Beau xx